• Sam Palmer

Mandated Mommy




"This is BULLSHIT! They're messing with nature!"


"Jim.... honestly. It's not that big of a deal."


"Easy for you to say, Sharon! Women weren't effected at all! Those bug eyed creeps came in and messed with US!"


Sharon rolled her eyes as she leaned across the counter and moved the glass of wine in front of her husband to safety from his wild hand gestures.


"I wouldn't say we weren't effected at all. The decree clearly stated animal meat and products were officially prohibited for everyone," she raised an eyebrow and shrugged as she brought her own glass to her lips.


"You have to give up meat and dairy, Sharon. I have to push our children out of my ass! MY ASS, SHARON!"


"Jim," she set her glass down gently. "You know that over population is a serious concern for our planet. It's unsustainable. Just like our meat consumption. Not to mention how inhumane it was to raise that many animals, pump them full of antibiotics and growth hormones. Just so we can have an endless supply of burgers and chicken wings? It was awful! And with men having the responsibility of child birth it pretty much ensures that birth control and safe sex practices will sky rocket. It's actually pretty brilliant. The Galactic Federation is simply finding solutions to protect us from ourselves. Those bug eyed creeps seem to know what they're doing. They don't have the same issues we do on their own planet."


Satisfied, Sharon again brought her red wine to her lips and took a slow sip. Jim sat frozen, his mouth slack and his eyes bulging as he stared at his calm wife. Finally unable to hold it in any longer he stood up abruptly, knocking back his barstool and slamming his hands down onto the kitchen counter.


"OUT OF MY ASS, SHARON! A BABY WILL BE COMING OUT OF MY ASS!"


Sharon tried her hardest not to laugh, but the smile pulled at the corners of her mouth. Jim grunted loudly and stormed out of the kitchen. She knew she should go after him and comfort him, but she decided to sip her wine for a moment more. She couldn't help but be tickled at the Galactic Federation's mandate. Having kids had been a hot topic in their marriage for the last five years. She wasn't sure she was ready to give up her body, sleep, and spare time to a child just yet, whereas Jim was simply bursting at the seams and constantly hounding her about it. She had a feeling that his eagerness for children might lose steam, which was unfortunate because suddenly motherhood didn't sound so bad to Sharon.

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